Tuesday, February 19, 2008



"/ hope no bones are broken?" "None to speak of," the Knight said,

as if he didn't mind breaking two or three of them. "The great art of riding, as I was

is-to keep your balance properly. Like this, you know-"

He let go the bridle, and stretched out both his arms

to show Alice what he

meant, and this time he fell flat on his back,

right under the horse's feet.

I don't want to discourage you, but Sagittarius men have this odd habit. They leap
on a big, white horse and go charging through the streets, waving a sword and
defending causes. Then they have another idiosyncrasy. They tumble around like
clowns in a circus, indiscriminately mixing with (he elephants and the bearded lady,
gaily scooping up cotton candy.

He can be captured with certain maneuvers. But first you've got to get him down off
that white horse, away from those elephants, and of course the bearded lady has to
go. Causes and circuses don't leave much time for family life, let alone sentimental

You have one thing going for you right away. So many Sagittarians charge around
and tumble through life that you'll have plenty to choose from. Remember the
Victor Herbert refrain; "Give me some men who are stouthearted men, who will
fight for the right they adore; Start me with ten, who are stout-hearted men, and I'll
soon give you ten thousand morel"? It happens like that. The idealistic enthusiasm
and curiosity of a Sagittarian man is contagious. Of course, sometimes his innocent
exuberance can get a little out of hand. Like he'll throw you up in the air in a
moment of mad, impetuous exhilaration-and forget to catch you.

There's almost always a crowd around him. That's another obstacle. You'll have to
push your way through all those people to get near him. But don't get pessimistic-
because this man is an optimist supreme. He's so optimistic, if his enemies mailed
him a huge carton of manure, he wouldn't be offended. He'd just figure they forgot
to include the horse. That kind of optimism can be dangerous. It's really just another
term for blind faith. The Sagittarian man has stacks of it. Now, blind faith is fine.
I'm all for it, being a fire sign myself. But it can lead to trusting with such naive
belief that he frequently falls into puddles. It's easy to fall into puddles when you're
running with a bow and arrow, always looking up in the sky for some high goal no
one else has ever had the courage to aim for-or no one else ever had the lack of
common sense to try to reach.

Trusting is great, but trusting the wrong people can slow down even a race horse. In
the strict sense of the word, he's not a misty dreamer. His dreams are always
scrutinized by Jupiter's intelligent logic and compelling curiosity. If they stand up
under the frank investigation of a Sagittarian, they're probably as practical as they
are wild, even if the world isn't quite ready for them. Once he's established that
there's some hope of fulfillment, he lugs out his paint pots and colors his practical
dreams with the most vivid and courageous imagination this side of the designers of
the Edsel. But the fuddy duddies are always waiting to stomp on progressive ideas
and strangle them before they've had the chance to prove themselves, and you


how many fuddy duddies there are around.

His soaring imagination can cause him to fall down or go busted. But wonderfully.
Lady Luck has a way of rescuing him just in time. This man is usually so lucky it's
disgusting and illegal. He could go prospecting in the hills, bring back a bag of
rocks, find out they're not gold, cry awhile, then discover they're uranium. If you
pick up that shiny object at your feet near the subway grating, it will be a piece of
tinfoil from an old chewing gum wrapper. If he picks it up, it will be a chip from the
Hope Diamond Harry Winston dropped when he was hailing a cab.

Naturally, with that kind of luck, he's optimistic. There's always that day when a
rock is a rock and tinfoil is tinfoil, but the typical Sagittarian recovers quickly from
such crushing blows. Your Jupiter man is very much that way about love. He's
lucky. When he isn't, he recovers quickly. He discriminates against dishonesty, but
that's about all, which is why he has so many friends and well-wishers. He looks
beyond the external appearance of people for a truer, more intrinsic value. Not that
he doesn't have enemies. There are a few, but far less than the number accumulated
by other Sun signs. People who have been stung by his frank remarks may glare at
him and feel like strangling him, but they usually come around to realizing his
harmless intent. The sin of the Sagittarian male is tactlessness and thoughtlessness,
never deliberate cruelty.

You may have discovered by now that his speech is as direct as his symbolic arrow.
He can say outrageous things, and if you're in love with him, he may get away with
it. But yotfll have every right to take offense when a Sagittarian man who has just
met you gazes at you frankly with his bright, alert eyes and remarks that you're just
the kind of woman a man would choose for a mistress. Just as you're ready to
clobber him, he'll get an innocent, boyish look on his face, and explain with
disarming candor that what he really meant was, well, the kings and aristocracy
back in the middle ages married for convenience. Their wives, therefore, were often
ugly, drab creatures, with good blood lines. But their mistresses were beautiful and
brilliant, the kind of girls they would have chosen to fall in love with and marry, if
the rules had been different. He's been reading up on it, because he's always been
curious about that particular period. You may calm down, and even feel a little
smug. You'll also be impressed. How many men spend hours reading history when
they don't have to do it? He might even be a genius. Just think, you could be the
wife of an intellectual! Wrong. You could be the mistress of an intellectual. By the
time he has you ga-ga over his brain, you won't realize that, had your reaction been
agreeable to his original proposition-and make no mistake, that's what it was-he
would have moved in fast, and you would be a fallen woman.

Of course, not every female would accept such a fumbling explanation of an
obvious pass; but it doesn't matter. Even after his victims explode in indignation,
they return. to be the Sagittarian's close friends again, when their anger cools. That
should show you just how much danger you're in with this apparently harmless
chap. With that candid, naive grin, he doesn't bear the faintest resemblance to a

wolf. He looks more like a Boy Scout troop leader.

But he is not a boy scout in romantic matters. It would pay to keep that in mind
when he asks you to go hiking.

The Sagittarius male lives his romantic life on a surface level, but he's honest about
it. (After all, if you'll brush those sentimental cobwebs out of your ears, you'll
remember he did say mistress. He did not say wife. He is not a king. And these are
not medieval times.) Sagittarius seeks casual relationships, and sometimes they can
get so casual they're downright promiscuous. Occasionally, the shenanigans of an
archer can put a Scorpio to shame, and I promise you it takes a great deal to put a
Scorpio to shame.

Let's get back to his honesty. It's a safer subject. If you've learned through bitter
experience how fickle other men's vows of eternal devotion can be, you'll welcome
his frankness. You won't even flinch when he tells you how many affairs he's had,
and what he expects of this one with you, all very clearly and logically. He won't
knowingly tie a legal knot with a lie in his heart or on his lips, but somehow, he can
get himself involved in a flirtation which tangles itself into a proposal (possibly
from the girl, not him), and have to run like sixty to avoid the altar. Since he's a little
clumsy, he may trip, and shell catch him before he gets too far away. In that event,
he'll think it Over and illogically decide that, since she appealed to him in one way-
either physically or mentally, no matter which-she'll eventually appeal to him the
other way. He'll give in, get married, and the seeds for another Sagittarian divorce
have been planted. His normally dependable reasoning powers seem to desert him
when he's romantically trapped.

Women often misinterpret the attitude of a Sagittarian, and think the relationship is
more serious than it really is, and this same quality also sometimes makes it appear
that he seeks a dark liaison, when he's only after a light, non-physical friendship, or
just a girl to pal around with. It seems the archer loses both ways. But he's lucky,
and most of his messes turn out straight. He's a flirt, that can't be denied, but he's

looking for sex alone. He likes variety and mental stimulation. If a woman gets
sticky when he was only diverting himself, hell try to pass the whole thing off as a
joke. She may definitely miss the punch line. (Remember how unsuccessful the
typical Sagittarian is with jokes.) Lots of Sagittarians get accused of making passes
at every good-looking receptionist or pretty girl they see-sometimes even the little
old woman who sells newspapers on the comer, or a lady policeman. Now, no man
in his right mind would seriously flirt with a lady policeman-at least, not while she's
on duty-so you can see that unjustified suspicion is annoying to the archer. In all
fairness, most of the time, he was just being breezily friendly.

If you're a smart girl, who uses her head for something besides an object to poke
under a hair dryer-and you'd better be, because these men insist on intelligence in a
woman-you'll have caught on by now. Don't be jealous. Don't be suspicious. Give
him lots of rope if you want to hang him eventually. Don't question him, weep, nag
or threaten to leave him. Smother him with freedom. Imagine how refreshing that

would be to him. If you take life in the same spirit he does, and take people as you
find them, you have the basic requirements of being his kind of wife-woman. As
long as you're basically honest with each other, flying kites together can be a ball.
Why worry about when they'll hit the ground? They look so beautiful and free,
soaring up there in the sky. No, you don't have to give this man everything he wants
to get him. Just be what he wants. Be wide-awake-let him direct and dominate your
energies. Love sports. Go camping with him and take your St. Bernard along for a
chaperone. Be generous, affectionate, enthusiastic, and don't try to keep him locked
up in your pantry making fudge every night. Make it clear he can't keep you all to
himself, either. Let him know you're a free spirit, just as he is. Never throw water on
his fiery ideas, and keep yourself busy with other things while he's out shooting his
arrows at impossible targets. That way, he'll tell you honestly some lovely night that
you are just about everything he needs in a woman. Once he's gone that far, then

him just as frankly that he's okay in your book, too, but it's time to make a decision.
Point out that you like him so much you'd even consider marrying him, if he'd
promise not to interfere with your freedom. Otherwise, you really don't have any
more time to camp around with him. It's a shame, you're so compatible, but you've
always been curious what it would be like to have children. Motherhood is a new
kite you'd like to fly. Be sure to arrange for an old flame to call you on the phone in
the middle of your speech. Accept the date casually, in front of your archer. When
you hang up, smile brightly and remark that there's no reason why you can't still
good friends. Then invite him to come along on your date, so he won't have to sit
around all by himself. That should do it. (You're welcome!)

After you're married, you probably won't have in-law trouble. Many Sagittarians are
shockingly disinterested in family ties. They don't accept the theory of loving blood
relations unless they deserve loving. Even those who are fond of their parents and
brothers or sisters manage to keep a healthy distance. They visit and show warm
affection, but they never expect relatives to interfere with their private lives. Better
see that your own relatives don't meddle, either.

Keep your suitcase packed. You'll be doing a lot of traveling. You'll still want to
take the St. Bernard along on camping trips-not as a chaperone anymore, but be-
cause your new husband loves animals. (Tell the dog it's okay now, he doesn't have
to stand guard outside the tent flap.) Keep yourself busy and give him as many
nights out as he needs. Never question his honesty. When he's in a temper, the
archer can break down a door, or punch a hole through a wall. He's just letting off
steam, but it does make a lot of work, and how many times can you call the
plasterer? It's a lot easier on everyone's nerves not to accuse him of a lack of
integrity in the first place. When he does something wrong, he'll almost surely tell
you. That will be hard enough to take without worrying about imaginary things.
Practice facing his frankness, if that tomorrow ever comes, and be prepared to know
he still loves you, instead of chasing after false rumors today. Be as practical as he
is about human emotions. You'll be surprised how strong love can grow in such
honest soil. Truth has a way of encouraging permanence in a relationship.

You'll have to put in some hours being a Polly-put-the-kettle-on woman. Since he's

a sports fan, he'll probably expect you to watch all the big games on TV with him.
But he'll also take you along to all his many social activities if you're pretty and fun
and you like people. Sagittarians can't stand droopy clinging women who aren't
good mixers. He'll be proud of any special talents you have, and do try to have one
or two. Read lots of books, and be prepared to defend a few of his causes, especially
the lost ones. -'

He may be a little extravagant, and he'll like an occasional game of chance, but the
same impulse will make him pretty generous about your spending money, if he's a
typical archer. He probably won't mind if you want to work to buy yourself extras.

Expect a little forthright criticism, often painfully lack-; ing in tact. You should be
used to it by now. Let it pass. You'll be busy enough patching up the damage with
his friends. You're supposed to understand him, remember? You gave him that, the
night you forced the issue.

He'll enjoy the children more when they're older, but babies and toddlers might
puzzle him a little. Sagittarius fathers usually love to take the youngsters on outdoor
excursions. He may be closer to the boys and share their sports and activities, but
he'll be tender with the girls. They'll find him more of a pal than a father image. The
older they get, the closer they'll be to him. Now and then, his frankness may disturb
them when they need privacy. Children are sensitive about their secrets, and their
feelings may suffer from his curious questions and plain-spoken observations.
Youthful escapades will amuse him rather than anger him, but his very tolerance
might keep them in line. He'll probably be strict only if they tell a lie. It will be one
of the few occasions they'll feel his displeasure. Don't ignore him for the little ones.
When he wants you to fly some kites with him, drop the diaper pins and the talcum,
call a sitter (not your mother) and go.

The archer thinks with both his heart and his mind. He won't always be wise.
Sometimes he'll be foolishly courageous. He'll stumble and fall, then get up and try
again. But you'll forgive him for almost anything, because he'll set your heart free
with a very great gift-an honest love.

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