The AQUARIUS Woman
But Alice had got so much into the -way
of expecting nothing but out-of-the-way things to happen
that it seemed quite dull and stupid
for life to go on in the common way ...
Put cats in the coffee, and mice in the tea- And welcome Queen Alice with thirty
The safest way to enter into romance with an Aquarian female is to remember she's
as paradoxical in love as she is in everything else. That way, you won't be expecting
Priscilla Alden and get Pocahontas.
This girl has all the faithfulness of the fixed signs when die's in love, but she also
has the detachment and lack of emotion of the air element. It's possible to have a
happy relationship with the Uranus woman if you leave her free to pursue her
myriad interests and circulate among her friends. Never try to tie her to the stove or
the bedpost. Ask the man who's tried. She can suddenly decide to study ballet,
meditate in the mountains or join the Peace Corps. Remember the story of the
princess with the long, golden hair who lived high in a tower? That's the Aquarius
female. Cutting off her flowing tresses won't change her any more than it did in the
fairy tale. She dreams different dreams than you or I. She hears a distant drummer-
and follows a star most of us have never seen.
She belongs to everyone, and yet to no one. Her love can be tender and inspired,
there will always be a vaguely elusive quality about it, like a half-remembered song.
You can hum the melody, but the lyrics keep slipping away. The Aquarian girl's
demand for freedom is insistent, but her allegiance to anyone who can accept
romance within such limits is boundless. Here's something you'll like:
She won't be terribly interested in your bank book (unless Cancer or Capricorn or
Taurus is on her ascendant). Money is never the prime consideration of the typical
Aquarian woman. She won't care if you're not the richest man in town, but she'll
expect you to be respected in some way for your intellectual achievements. Dr.
Christian Bamard and his heart transplants or Wemher von Braun and his rockets
interest her far more than J. Paul Getty and his billions.
When you set out to catch this butterfly in your net, remember that she'll never
spend her unpredictable life with a man who isn't true to himself. Her own code of
ethics may be as weird as anything you've ever come across, and quite different
from the accepted codes of society, but she lives up to it totally. She'll understand
that your rules may also be highly individual. That's fine with her, but don't
compromise those rules. If you're looking for a passion flower, you've picked the
wrong daisy. Passion is not her forte if she's a typical Aquarian. She'll think physical
love is pleasant enough, if it's not overemphasized. In other words, she can take it
leave it alone. Uranus females can respond to lovemaking with a haunting, deep
intensity, but if you prefer to keep it platonic for long periods of time, that's all right,
too. Like all Aquarians, she may have an unconscious fear that desire for one person
will imprison the spirit in some way, and keep her from being true to her one great
love-freedom. Freedom to experiment and investigate and freedom to give time to
humanity. Also freedom to pursue her rather kicky, off-beat fancies.
She's an ideal girl if you're planning a political, scientific or educational career. You
couldn't do better, unless you happen to run across an Aquarian girl with adverse
planetary positions in her natal chart who enjoys shocking people by walking
barefoot down Main Street or smoking big black cigars on buses. There are some
pretty wild, way-out Uranian females here and there. But the average girl born
under the sign of the water bearer is a social delight. She's graceful, witty, bright as
a penny, and extremely adaptable to all forms of society, high and low and in the
Her lack of suspicion under normal circumstances is a special bonus. A traveling
salesman should find his dream girl in the typical Aquarian female. If she actually
catches you being unfaithful, it will cause a deep wound to her sensitive nature.
You'll know it the minute you look into those strange, dreamy eyes. But she won't
suspect you without cause, and she'll rarely doubt your word. The typical Uranus
woman will never check up on you after you leave, phone you at the office, inspect
your handkerchiefs for lipstick stains or look for blonde hairs caught in your cuff
link. Deception will have to be brought forcibly to her attention; she won't go out
looking for it. Before you give her too much credit, consider that her lack of pas-
sionate jealousy is due to something more than strength of character. First of all, she
probably dissected your psyche under a microscope before she gave you a second
glance. Besides, she has so many outside interests and so many people who turn
on to talk with, there's not much time for her to worry about what you're doing when
you're out of sight. Out of sight can often mean out of mind for Aquarians of both
sexes. Absence seldom makes the Uranus heart grow fonder. Occasionally, an
Aquarian woman will suffer a promiscuous or flirtatious mate, because there's
something she needs which she can find only with him, so she looks the other way.
On the other hand, if she doesn't really need you, that moral strength will work in
reverse at the first actual proof of infidelity. Shell simply walk away. Don't try to
kindle the embers, they're stone cold dead. Of course, you can still be friends. Why
She's willing. It never embarrasses an. Aquarian girl to be chummy with ex-lovers
or husbands. She's forgotten the past and wiped the slate clean of memories.
There is one peculiar and notable exception to the rule. Like the Uranus man, the
Uranian female will remember the first true and honest love for a lifetime. Only the
first, however. Are you wondering whether that Aquarius girl you once knew still
remembers you? The answer lies in her definition of love. It could have something
to do with the first boy who gave her a bunch of sweet peas when she was nine-the
boy who walked her through the park in the rain-or the one with the funny ears who
knew the clown at the circus, and used to feed her peanuts.
Uranus women involved in extra-marital affairs are rare. They can be tempted in
exceptional situations, but a dishonest relationship goes against their chemistry. It
won't be long until an undercover romance is broken off for good. Yet, there are
many Aquarian divorcees. There's a reason. If a situation becomes intolerable, the
Uranian nature turns cold suddenly. They can disappear overnight, and never look
back. They don't seek or enjoy divorce, but it isn't the shock to them it is to their
more sentimental sisters. Uranus rules change, you know. Since she's such an
individualist, with a list of friends several miles long, the Aquarian female never
hesitates to make her way alone if the need arises.
Expect her to probe into your heart until you haven't a secret left, or a dream that
hasn't been analyzed. But don't try to dissect her private thoughts. That's not the
the game is played with Aquarians. She'll keep her motives hidden, and sometimes
take a perverse pleasure in deliberately confusing you. She'll usually be truthful to a
fault, but remember, with an Aquarian, telling a lie is one thing. Refraining from
telling the whole story is another.
It's comforting to know that an Aquarian girl is pretty cagey with a buck. That is, it's
comforting to know unless you're planning to hit her for a loan. She might say yes a
time or two, but if you let your credit rating slip, she can be colder than the guy at
the bank when you skip your car payment. On the rare occasions when she accepts a
small loan herself, you'll get back every penny with no stalling, excuses or feminine
wiles, if she's a typical Uranus female. As for every man's nightmare of charge
accounts, you'll have little worry on that score. Aquarian women are uncomfortable
about owing money. Bad debts don't fit in with the Uranus code.
Her appearance is puzzling. Most Aquarian women are lovely, with a haunting,
wistful beauty. But they're changeable. They can give an impression of smooth
whipped cream, then suddenly switch to salty pizza as quickly as a bright, blue, zig-
zag bolt of Uranian electricity. Next to Ubrans, Aquarian females are often the most
beautiful women in the zodiac. At the very least, they're interesting-looking. The
Aquarian manner of dressing can stop you dead in your tracks. There are a few of
them who could grace the cover of a fashion magazine, but the average Aquarian
girl is anything but conventional about her costumes. She can wear some outfits a
gypsy would envy, and her naked individuality can produce some mighty unique
combinations. She'll usually be the first to wear a new fad, no matter how zany it is,
yet she can also stick to Grandma's styles-even great-grandma's styles. With typical
- Aquarian indifference, she'll mix yesterday's lace snood with today's metallic jump
suit, and the effect can be a little startling. She'll wear her lace nightgown to a
formal banquet, ostrich feathers to the supermarket, bell bottom slacks to the opera,
sneakers to the theater, diamonds when she visits the zoo-and top it all off with a
faded Mother Hubbard she picked up in a thrift shop.
Your Aquarian girl will probably have an unusual way of wearing her hair. Her
tresses are as unpredictable as her personality. They can be worn braided,
pinned in a bun, flowing down like a waterfall, short as a marine's, in Mary Pickford
curls or as straight as a poker. One thing you can depend on. Her hair won't look
like the hair of any other female on this planet.
A conversation with her can be remarkable, to say the least. She has charming
manners, and usually behaves in a timid, almost reserved way. Then comes one of
those sudden Uranus urges, and out will pop a remark with absolutely no relation to
what anyone is saying. You'll be talking about the fluctuations of the stock market,
and she'll interrupt out of nowhere with: "Did you know that Woodrow Wilson, Jack
Kennedy, Herbert Hoover, Harry Truman, Calvin Coolidge, Benjamin Harrison,
Franklin and Theodore Roosevelt and William McKinley all have double letters in
their names?" There's only one way to answer a question like that. Tell her she
Fillmore, Ulysses Grant and Thomas Jefferson. Then gently, but firmly, lead the
discussion back to the stock market. Other minds may progress in fairly logical
steps, but hers rigs into tomorrow, then zags back into today with no more sense of
direction than a flash of lightning. Now and then she'll toss off an unexpectedly
poignant phrase. You'll ask her what she thinks of space travel and she'll answer,
"When I was a little girl, I thought the stars were holes in the floor of heaven where
the light shone through." If she's in a different mood, you'll say that melted
snowmen make you sad, and shell counter with: "A melted snowman is just a pile of
slush, Charlie." First misty-then practical. First timid-then rowdy. Aquarian women
will rudely ridicule flying saucers, then tell you a story about a polka-dotted elf on a
windowsill. Never talk down to an Aquarian female. She'll resent not being
considered your equal, and an unsympathetic attitude will cause her to retreat and
Since Uranus rules the future, you might imagine that these girls would be natural
mothers. Children do, after all, belong to the future. But the average Aquarian
woman may be bewildered by motherhood in the beginning. She has to adjust to
devoting all her attention and energy exclusively to one human being for a period of
time, when she's used to spreading herself far and wide, and this can take some
practice. Her natural aloofness may make it difficult for her to demonstrate warm
affection outwardly. The typical Aquarian mother is devoted to her offspring, but
also somewhat detached toward them. But shell probably be the most willing PTA
worker in the neighborhood. She'll talk happily for hours with their small friends on
their own level without patronizing them, and she'll give up her afternoons to work
for a school project. The children will learn the lessons of brotherhood and
humanity from her by observation. Aquarian mothers are never fiercely protective
of their children. They take a tolerant view of the most startling confession. A
Uranus woman will seldom punish a child for telling the truth, no matter what he's
done. With her unprejudiced viewpoint, she'll gain the complete confidence of her
little ones. She's great at reassuring young minds about everything from monsters
hiding under the bed to the pain of being ignored in the playground. She can turn
their tears to laughter in minutes. Your children will find her jolly fun, a little helter-
skelter, relaxed about housework, helpful with homework and gentle when they're
ill. She won't smother them with affection, and she'll seldom nag. Maybe Tommy
didn't wash his hands the third time he was told, but she's more interested in what
learned in science class.
We may be a little ahead of ourselves. Even though Uranus likes to reverse the
existing orders of things, before your Aquarian girl becomes a mother she has to
become a wife. And before she becomes your wife, you'll have to convince her that
marriage isn't synonymous with Al-catraz. She won't exactly rush into matrimony.
She's in no hurry to take your name until she's weighed you, sorted you, tested you,
and found out what makes you tick. The opinions of her friends and family will
mean nothing, though she may ask them what they think out of curiosity. She has
her own yardstick for measuring you. Assuming you pass her test, marriage to an
Aquarian girl can be confusing. She'll listen pleasantly when you give her advice,
but there's something in the Uranian make-up that prevents her from following
directions explicitly. She can't stick to the recipe when she bakes one of her angel
food cakes anymore than she can park the car exactly where you told her to. There's
some kind of a snag in her thinking that causes her to believe just a little twist will
improve anything. But shell smile agreeably as she goes on her own sweet way.
There's a constant urge to experiment with a different way to make the coffee, fill
her pen, fasten her ice skates or cross the street. She'll wear a sweater backwards,
mix her brandy with milk, arrange flowers in a fish bowl, rinse her hair in shaving
lotion or make a rock garden on your desk. But don't ask her why. She doesn't know
herself. The unique and unusual is her wave-length, that's all.
Because her nature is so impersonal, expressions of deep feeling won't come easily.
Except for those sudden remarks that sound likes a combination of Robert Frost and
Yogi Berra, she has few words with which to express her love, and her pattern of
physical passion is woven closely with threads connected to the mind and soul.
Although the unique Uranus outlook leads some Aquarian girls into peculiar
attachments, once they find the right mate their marriages are usually models of
Your Aquarian woman can float through her days and nights with all the grace of a
proud swan, but she may behave like a clumsy bear in romantic situations. The line
between friendship and love is often all but invisible to Aquarius. Love songs about
people who only have eyes for each other strike her as silly. There are so many
miracles in the world for eyes to behold, it seems to her a terrible waste for two
pairs of them to do nothing but gaze into each other's depths. Shell be glad to let
take her hand and walk beside her as she looks with happy delight on the sunrise, an
antique car, the milkman's horse, a yellow garbage pail, a stuffed owl or a red
balloon caught in a church steeple. But don't distract her with too much to-
getherness. Let her wander through her wonderland alone when she chooses, and
she'll never question your pinochle games with the boys.
The quickest ways to lose her are to show jealousy, pos-sessiveness or prejudice;
be critical, stuffy or ultra-conservative. You'll also have to like her friends, who will
come in odd, assorted sizes and shapes.
She's susceptible to sudden flashes of inspiration, and her intuition is remarkable.
Her judgment may not seem sound or practical at first, because she sees months
years ahead. The Aquarian girl lives in tomorrow, and you can only visit there
through her. What she says will come true, perhaps after many delays and troubles,
but it will come true. I suppose, after all, that's the most special thing about your
February woman. She's a little bit magic.